Isn’t it crazy how it’s March 73rd?
My days in lockdown have gotten progressively weirder and WHOLLY counterproductive. Getting out of bed is now a thing on my to-do list. I don’t even make my bed anymore because MY couch, MY rules. Pants are a thing of the past, and my hair, it’s so long… I look like a Lord of the Rings character 😢. Two months into the pandemic and I have devolved into doing slightly above the bare minimum then kinda sorta calling it a “day.” And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about myself in lockdown, it’s that at all times I am only ever waiting for my next meal.
Are we all in this together, truly? Let’s compare! I present to you my daily quarantine schedule, more or less.
6:45AM – Wake up
7:00-9:00AM – Get out of bed?????
9:30AM – Breakfast (or, if I chance passed out early the night before, Dinner)
9:55AM – Chug iced coffee
10:00-1:00PM – “Work”: browse what few freelance gigs are available, draft pitches and cold call opportunities, dissociate in between, then worry I’m not accomplishing enough during quarantine— an existential panic that can only be soothed by fast food 😊
1:30PM – Embark on a lunch quest to Taco Bell
2:30PM – Feel guilty about indulging in fast food yet again
3:00PM – Dissociate
3:30PM – Begin stretching with the intent to exercise
4:00PM – 2nd lunch, or pre-dinner (the 2 soft tacos I was saving) after working up an appetite from the effort it took to stretch
5:00PM – Catch up on the news: Coronavirus case count here in Hawaii, browse the comments section re: Covidiot travelers breaking the mandated 14-day quarantine, and finally braving myself to read about our Covidiot-in-chief
6:30PM – Pour Whiskey down my throat after having read the news
7:00PM – Drunkenly dissociate
7:30PM-10:00PM – Commit to watching a new release, only to put on Parks and Recreation instead 😊
10:15PM – Dinner
11:00PM – Free time to write (More or less a Free Space like in Bingo)
11:45PM – Give up. Like, in general 🥴
12:00-3:00AM – Aggressively refresh Amazon, Best Buy, GameStop, Target, and Walmart pages hopeful for a Nintendo Switch restock
End of Day
Time really is a construct.
So how about it, reader? What does your daily quarantine schedule look like? 😂😂😂