Game of Thrones and the Limits of Prophecy

In “The Long Night’s” Game Revealed featurette, Kit Harington remarks of Arya being the one to kill the Night King: “I was pissed that it wasn’t me.”

It’s the easiest thing to imagine, isn’t it? Jon Snow coming back from the dead, becoming King of the North, turning out to be the heir to the Iron Throne then going on to defeat the Night King. So easy it’s almost too good to be true.

I think that’s the problem. Continue reading

‘Game of Thrones’ The Long Night – A Brutal Exercise in Survival Horror

Sunday’s “The Long Night” was BY FAR the most stressful 80-minutes of television I have ever experienced. I’m going to lead with that, because, whatever complaints people may have over certain prophecies “unfulfilled,” or improper flexes of the term “Mary Sue,” or overall body count; Game of Thrones’ latest is still a breathtaking exercise in medieval survival horror. So fine-tune those TV presets (turn OFF motion smoothing/auto-motion plus AND set your sharpness to 0; you’re welcome) and let us begin. Continue reading

The ‘Game of Thrones’ Deadpool (Fun)

“Winterfell” was quite the crowd-pleaser, wasn’t it? Sporting an echo-introduction harkening back to the very first episode (symmetry, man), the surviving Stark children FINALLY united, Arya laying down the tracks for a possible romance, Sansa in total command of herself and her people, Dany showing Jon how to train a dragon; all of our heroes (mostly) in one pivotal locale. It’s almost too good to be true!

You just KNOW something horrible is about to happen.

Having marathoned the past 7 seasons and getting a better read on some bits of foreshadowing, I think it’s past time to lay down some fun death predictions. Now, I’m not betting that GoT will go out Hamlet-style, but if everyone *were to bite the dust, how would they go? Again, just having fun with this because even as a book fan, I’ve never been able to predict where the show would end up post-ASOIF flow. If you’re looking to place actual bets, DM me and we’ll exchange Venmo accounts and discuss odds.

 

CERSEI – liver failure (she drinks SO MUCH)

JAIME – honor

DAENERYS – pride

JON SNOW – Ygritte’s ghost

THEON – what is dead may never die

SAMWELL – he’s a stand-in for GRRM so he’ll live 👍

TYRION – also liver failure (he drinks and knows things, remember?)

imageTORMUND – chasing Brienne

BRIENNE – running away from Tormund

EURON – a Bam Margera stunt gone wrong

THE HOUND – like a boss

ARYA – *dies* *steals death’s face* *lives*

DAVOS – hell to pay with his wife

VARYS – oh, he’s still here???

JORAH – friend zone asphyxia

SANSA – *won’t, for she is the one true queen of this writer’s heart ❤️

JOE JONAS – mysterious circumstances 😈

MELISANDRE – sheath to a certain great sword of a certain great prophecy

BRAN – will live on in the annals of meme history

 

See y’all on Sunday. Cheers! ❄️🔥🐺🐉🦑🦁🧟‍♂️⚔️👑

A Clash of Swords: Game of Thrones’ Best Battles

The Long Night is upon us y’all.

After taking a year off, it’s safe to say the anticipation for Game of Thrones’ final season is ready to burst like the Sept of Baelor. As we wait out this final stretch before the premiere, I’ll be taking a look back on past seasons with deep dives, discussions, and lists long enough to test Arya’s patience.

First up: the show’s best battle sequences. I’m not going to limit myself to just the big army battles, but all the spectacular PVPs in between. It’s going to get bloody. (And, from what’s been teased of the upcoming season, it’s about to get even bloodier.)

Let the ranking begin. Continue reading